Cyber memories

First off – Merry Christmas everyone!!! I think this has to be my best Christmas yet (as an adult) purely because of the little one and things are just…better all round.


So this year, Freya asked Santa for a bike! A red bike! (The colour – to our dismay – kept on changing! But we drilled in red after some time) It was just magical. There was a ribbon attached to the bike that went all the way upstairs so she had to follow it. Her reaction was just priceless.

‘My bike. My special bike from Father Christmas. He has been.’

I have this on video which I have watched many times to see her joy. I think she could have just stopped there but obviously Santa had run around like a headless chicken making sure there was stuff to fill the sack. Ahhh more toys…ahhh plastic tacky stuff…..ahhh more landfill….ahhh the guilt.

The subject for today though that I am struggling with is this. Should we post our memories to cyber space? aka all social media realms.

Opinion A: No, how awful they are private memories that you should keep private and store in your brain. Social media is the devil.

Opinion B: Yes, upload and invite the world to see snippets of your life (so long as they are filtered and your privacy settings are turned on)

Opinion C: Share Share Share we are only on this earth once and Freya has a family album online and ready to download.

The reason I write this is quite simply because I love to take photos and write. To share feels the natural next step especially at the touch of a smart phone button (?)

Also I’ve realised that yes the next statement is massively vain, fickle and probs birthed out of self esteem issues (whatever) but I make more effort if I think I could be papped. Doesn’t everyone? Which as a new mum that forgot about her image – it’s a nice to have a bit more of a reason to care about myself in a weird way. Like, make an effort mate, your daughter who is 2 has better style and confidence. So yes proceed and creatively share yourself.

But, stop!!!!!!


Social media, smartphones and spending effort in a world that doesn’t exist will lead to addiction (checking likes) and isolation (you will no longer be able to have real relationships any more). Go forth live your life in the real world. Walks in nature, family, friends, cooking, holidays, reading, painting. A simple life will bring contentment.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! To share or not to share that is the question.






Be a new age princess

Ok, so, I know this topic of discussion is not by any means ground breaking but it’s a message from me to my future grown up daughter I want her to know.

Image result for new age princess

The topic is this: Superheroes and Princesses.

The above was actually a party we went to recently, where we had: – Spiderman, Incredible Hulk, Storm-troopers, Superman and Thor! There we then about 5 Elsa’s and Ana’s running amongst the heroes. I couldn’t help but feel annoyed – cheated almost. Like feminism had no effect to children’s fancy dress manufacturers???

I don’t want the message to Freya to be let the boys have the action, let them save the world! You will be far too busy with singing snowman and ice castles to contend with worldy issues. I can’t think of one (non-sexy) female heroine: – Cat-woman (pure sex) wonderwoman (hot pants alert) black widow (side character) poison ivy (disturbed villain)…that ginger girl from Brave (haven’t seen it).

I recently saw a TED talk on how there are LOADS of female marvel characters that are heroines (or villains) who are just not known. If they are known, they are side characters or still unfortunately seen as love interests to the main male role. Why is this? Have we not moved on from Disney love stories yet?  Are we still clinging on to the concept of prince charming chopping down thorny beanstalks on his black stead to come and rescue the princess in the tower?

I feel the world is changing and Disney hasn’t caught up. Constantly on social media, ‘millenials’ (I just fit into this bracket) are told: –

*Don’t wait for your prince to rescue you, rescue yourself.
*Be the author of your own life.
*Quote: “Don’t fashion me into the maiden that needs saving from a dragon. I am the dragon that will eat you whole.” End quote!

To conclude, women are told, be strong, believe in yourself, save yourself and my darling you have the power to save the world too. Why aren’t little girls told this too?!

Alas in the run up to Christmas I see a large fluffy pink cloud approaching. Full of babies, cots, small kitchens, iron boards, peppa pig, princess dress ups, fairy dress ups, tea party sets, ballerinas, butterflies, cupcakes, pink, glitter and sequins!

Now, don’t get me wrong there is well and truly a place for glitter and sparkles…what’s not to love? So pweeettty and mesmerising! But I can’t help feeling like I’m sending Freya on a path of materialistic, superficial, domesticated pink doom.

I know I sound like a total raging feminist but haven’t we forgotten equality??? Make a film Disney that makes little boys ask the question…who would win in a fight superman or XXX? ‘XXX’ would obvs be a female who kicks ass.

And so sweetheart the message of this particularly long blog is: –

Be a new age princess.
Believe in yourself.
Embrace all the elements that make you unique.
Be kind.
Be strong.
Be tough and fight for everything you think is right and just.
You can save the world my girl.

Mummy xxx

p.s Happy Halloween my little witch (Witches are pretty cool – they have super cool special magic powers!)

Two and a bit marvellous

Image result for maybe the hokey pokey is what it's really all about

Back to the reason I started this blog. You.

So, what’s going on with you.

Things you love: –

*The Hokey Cokey! Yep that’s right you love it! In fact any kind of sing song. You’re all over it. You went to a party at the weekend and you started doing it solo. Doin’ mamma proud.

*Pasta and mascarpone sauce (I googled the spelling, I swear that’s right!) I tried to give you an organic red pesto and ricotta sauce with your spinach and ricotta pasta and I got ‘this sauce is a bit yucky, I like the other one’. Right. Got it.

*You sleep with flopsy bunny every night (still)

*Your baby — except this is very exciting for me – my mum (your grandma) gave you my baby and my cot and you love it! You have named her Zoe (re-named as I called her Natalie) and you put her to bed, wake her up, put her to bed, wake her up. The poor girl can’t catch a break, no wonder she’s always ‘crying’ and ‘needs a hug’.

*Peppa pig – hence the name Zoe (after Zoe Zebra). I think we have seriously watched every single episode. I get quite excited when I think it’s one we haven’t watched…but then it’s like…oh wait…no…hold on…seen it. Damn.

*Nursery – wahoooo! Your little smiley face when I pick you up from nursery warms my heart up ten fold. You come running out of the door with a big smile on your face every time.

Things I love about you: –

*The way you run. It’s more of a sassy waddle! When you grow and stretch that waddle will go. Maybe keep the sassy element tho’.

*Your imagination is amazing. Today we played ‘doctors’ for ages. We had Mr.T.Bear who had a bad stomach and Miss.F.Pony who had poorly hooves. Don’t fear readers –  we had some cream to put on them. Then I was poorly and you were the doctor, you mimicked me perfectly and introduced yourself to the patient with your full name with complete ease. Your professionalism could put some actual doctors to shame.

*Your confidence. I don’t know if this is part of you or because you are 2 and haven’t learnt social awkwardness yet, but you can (and do) just go up to people you (vaguely) know and start asking them questions. Mostly ‘can you jump up and down, like this?’ And the best bit is you make grown men and woman jump up and down on the spot just because you asked.

*Your maturity – which at times as I write this seems odd as you are 2 and you flip out over a door being open or closed, but I forget you are 2. You laugh when adults laugh. Your sense of humour is sometimes so wicked and so well timed – I think how can you be 2??

*Your eyes – I know I’m getting into really cheesy, cliche territory here, but you are an old soul my girl. There is a wisdom in your eyes that only comes from being on this earth before and there is a sparkle that flickers so brightly when you laugh. That light makes me ridiculously happy.

*Your brain – I know mums brag but you are so bright sweetheart. You can write, F (for Freya) D (for daddy) and M (for mummy) and you can draw hearts and circles. You can say onomatopoeia, supercilious and democracy. However when it comes to saying spaghetti you really struggle. 🙂

I’ll stop waffling now. Till next month…



‘Home all day’

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I get it now!!!!

You know when thousands of partners who get up, get dressed, leave the house, go to work and then come home and say the most irritating words known to stay at home parents (I’m not sexist) everywhere…

‘Wow, what happened in here?’

‘Yes, I’ve had a great day thanks darling…oh what is that you are talking about in a passive aggressive way…the mess??? That would be your temperamental, highly strung, strong willed toddler with the attention span of a small puppy.’

‘Alright, calm down, what are we having dinner?’

‘God knows, I didn’t manage to go to the shops’ aka I wanted to avoid going into a shop and being the parent of the insane small person having an extreme meltdown over a packet of Skips.

‘Babe, I’m going to have to go back out, you’ve been home all day.’

Now before, this would always really annoy me as actually I haven’t been home ‘all day’. I try and give our child structure and fresh air and an ‘activity’ which involves bonding time for myself and my daughter: To develop her fragile little mind. Plus, getting her dressed and out of the house is more of a challenge than………..erm………….let’s just say it really really hard. So FU I haven’t been home all day. I’m not the nanny, the cleaner, the chef, the ‘stock replenisher’ and the fat controller! ha ha that isn’t PC anymore is it!

*And relax*

However, recently, whilst being off work and no nursery school, I haven’t had a lot of plans, I wake up and think ‘oh, bugger, no structure to the day – let’s just wing it at home’. Which means we just end up milling about the house. Because of this, you actually get stuff done!!!!


Dan has come home to a clean and tidy house each day. I feel organised. Productive. I’m winning the war on domestic mess. Boom. Meanwhile Freya’s brain rots as she plays with play-doh for the 4th day in a row.

Thugs just need their mums

From my last post, a lot of stuff has ‘gone down’.

I no longer work part-time. I am now, how you say, a full time mum until I come up with an excellent plan to have it all. The career, amazing parent skills, the body – you know it all!!

Enough about me, this is a blog my growing girl/monster. So first off – we’ve bought a new house! It’s awesome. It’s bigger. It’s in the country. It has a garden.

Rewind to 1 month ago where we are in the midst of buying a house. It’s bloody stressful. I’ll just briefly go over the conversation I had with the child psychologist on the phone so that you get where I’m at…

Child psychologist: How can I help?

Me: Well, my child has become particularly scrappy at nursery (what I mean here is completely bat shit crazy – she’s a feral beast that needs solitary confinement) and her nana was called in to sign a form about an ‘incident’ the other day. (The incident being that she nearly gauged some girl’s eye out).

Child psychologist: How old is she?

Me: She’s two and two months. I know this behaviour is very common for her age, however this scrappiness has gone on for a while now and it’s with family members too. Sometimes quite vicious. *continue rambling* she hits if you get in her personal space and sometimes there is this look in her eye that is quite scary like she is intent on hurting. I’m worried that she might have a particularly aggressive nature?

Child psychologist: Is there anything going on at home at the moment if you don’t mind me asking?

Me: Erm well yes, we are in the process of buying a house and tensions are probably quite high at home.

Child psychologist: She is probably picking up on all the tension at home. If you are really concerned keep a diary of all the incidences and in 3 months come back to me if it hasn’t gone away.

Now at the time – I was thinking yeah ok, it does sound classic textbook psychology, but I felt sure that Freya was becoming an angry disturbed little human being and my concerns were being dismissed.

Rewind to 1 month in the new house with happy parents and a mum that is more hands on and pwoof! – the scrappy behaviour has gone. Now, we are all about the cuddles and kisses! Is this coincident? Does it have an affect on her me being home? Does she benefit more from a mum at home?

Which then creates the question which I’m sure most women in the UK ask themselves. Is it better for my child to be a stay at home mum or work?





I’m in trouble.


So, I think my two year old is smarter than me. Not like she outwits me because all kids outwit their parents. True fact.

To clarify, I think she is smarter than I ever was. On what basis I hear you say?

Well it’s not exactly what she knows at 2 years old (e.g counting to 20 and can spell her own name) as I’ve google this s*** and there are some other freaky Mensa toddlers roaming the UK so it’s just normal –  it’s more the speed she just ‘gets’ things.

I swear to you now, I never taught her how to hold a pencil and when I first saw her writing and colouring she looks like a 90 year old woman who has done it a thousand times over. I know that I’m not persuading you and that’s a poor example but I say to Dan ‘I think she’s reincarnated, she just knows too much for it to be new’. Obvs I am met with the usually scoffs from Dan about a notion as flowery as ‘reincarnation’.

I know most mums are prone to bragging, but this is more alarming. When she goes to school there will be no stopping her. In years to come she’ll look down on me as the endearingly dizzy (but foolish) mother. She’ll go to her dad for her homework (maths thank god!) and then there will be that moment when now she sees me as her main source of knowledge for this big bad world we live in, and then one day she will stop asking me questions.

That ‘ask mummy’ bubble will pop.

And so with new vigor I will respond with enthusiasm for every small fry question I can answer.

‘Mummy, what noise does a giraffe make?’






You’re 2!


You love:

the Gruffalo. I have watched it about 40 times.
your baby ballet (it is really cute) especially bending your knees.
your trampoline and jumping on the bed in general.
talking – you could talk for England – you give me a running commentary of what is going on.
Food – pretty much anything – pasta in particular.
Swimming – nana takes you and you love it.
Hiding – it’s your favourite game.
Hop hop little bunnies is still your favourite song
Watching these weird videos on youtube called un-boxing (it’s odd but strangely addictive)
Your Auntie Char – she is your number 1 favourite no one else gets a look in.

You hate:


Not fussed about:


Now sleeping is in the bag…..potty training is next on the agenda!!! Aahhh!